Thursday, April 2, 2015

THE LIST: a follow up

It's only fair that I take a minute to evaluate what I did, and did not check off on my list. And maybe an explanation or two...


("don't come back until you do them all")         ok, this was a tad unrealistic.

- make out on a vespa                                this probably could've happened the night I did the wine tour and met my Australian friends, but ALAS my stomach had other ideas...

- one night stand ("yolo")      I'll address this one at the end...

-make out with someone that doesn't speak any English    Ok, SO MUCH KISSING. none of my non English speaking prospects were appealing...

- Find a blonde italian and take a pic with them    CHECK!

- find an italian 5 years younger and one ten years old and get gelato   Oddly specific. I nailed the gelato portion though..

- get invited and go to Sunday dinner at someone's house    CHECK!

- go topless on a nude beach   I TRIED! I actually WANTED to do this one too!

- stomp grapes    Not as easy to find this opportunity in Italy as you might think.  

- drink a bottle of wine with a winemaker    CHECK!

- play soccer with the locals         CHECK! (at school with the kids)

- make your own pasta and cannoli ("interpret that how you please.")    wish I had been able to take a cooking class!

- get dressed up and go out   CHECK!

- get a photo take in cinque terre    CHECK!

- see live music   CHECK! (Mr. Stevie Wonder and Backstreet Boys)

- pic with something of Napoleon on Elba Island  No, but I did replace this one with a better grand adventure to Sansone Beach!

- selfie with old hilarious italian CHECK! (this was one of my favorites!)

- pic with a dog in basket on bike ("you're gona have to be bold.")    CHECK!

- Lady & the tramp reenactment with a total italian dog ("aw yeah.")   What does this even mean?

- learn this in italian, "my name is Lauren, my hair is long, my boobs are small, and I'd like for you to buy me a drink" (drink can be anything that helps you complete this list)                               This I did learn from the tour guide on the Taste of Tuscany Wine Tour van ride back to Florence. I did not, however, use it.

- "You will be traveling with 3 condoms..should said 3 condoms not be used, you will share them with italians"    I came back with them. Fail. Clearly didn't use them, and forgot to dole them out. Oops!

- pub crawl     CHECK! (extra points for joining the Bachelor Party?)

- PS if you find a blind AND blonde italian the rest of this list is considered done (must prove blindness)    Yeah, NO

- bring back 7 peroni coasters     Fail.

- learn how to make limoncello    I drank homemade limoncello with Gianni and he may or may not have given tips on how he makes it, but it was all in Italian!

- go wine tasting   CHECK!

- go to italian rivera    CHECK! (Camogli)

- go for runs in picturesque spots in Italy      CHECK! (despite the 95 degree weather...)

- go skinny dipping at night         Fail.

- cook an italian meal for an italian      CHECK? (Does cooking MYSELF an Italian meal count?)

- take a pic with someone named Augustine (my grandfather's name) or last name puco/puca         This would've been amazing, but I didn't meet anyone with those names.

- send a message in a bottle     MAJOR CHECK!

- frolic in a field of wild and/or sunflowers      CHECK!

- dance with a stranger to live music outside      Dance with a stranger? CHECK! just not to live music outside

- go horseback riding      Unfortunately, no. I'll add this to another list!

Ok, let's address the elephant in the room. I obviously did not check off the one night stand. Despite much pressure from friends and the good intentions behind this task, I did not encounter any prospects or opportunities that I felt compelled to do so. To be honest, most of the Italian and other European men I met and chatted with, I was not interested in recruiting for this gig. Tight pants, overly aggressive, and in the case of "Steve," sounded like a bit like Dracula. With the exception of Tim, the hot airport guy, I just wasn't interested. And we all know how that turned out. I'll be ready when I am, and on my own terms. Perhaps there just isn't room for a task like that on my list.  

I do however, feel accomplished in what I did check off, and the things I pushed myself to do out of my comfort zone. This was only the beginning. Onto the next list...

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